Comments

Madison-I think it's awesome that you want to travel and teach English as a second language. As you know, I also love to read and write. I am also pretty fascinated with language, though I haven't had the chance to actually learn one. You are one of the first people I talked to when I started here three years ago, good luck next year! ~Fwinter

Hey Amber! I also love being creative, I have for as long as I remember. I have a younger sister, her name is Jade and I love her so much. She lives three hours away though. I also have a job, though sometimes I have an urge to quit because it gets really stressful. I normally only read fiction as well. I have enjoyed sharing two classes with you this semester, its been fun, especially graphic design II. Good luck at MSU!

Chad-I am sagittarius too, and my twin stepsisters share a birthday on the 12th, so thats cool. I also hate horror movies, but I do enjoy cheesy old ones. Good luck, and have fun next year!

I used to collect rocks as well when I was younger, I dont do it anymore though. I also graduate Friday! what a coincidence. Im not sure I'm ready to leave yet either, but im excited to see my friends again next year at OTC. I wish you good luck and a Bright future. I enjoyed class with you.

About A Boy Prompts

Kids are cruel.
I think that the modern world has advanced a bit since older times. Kids are more acceptable of the things that their peers say and do. Yes kids can be mean, they can be bullies, but they usually aren't as bad as they are portrayed as in the movies. I know that when I was younger I was bullied a few times, but it was usually just one person, not a group of them. I know that if someone that age was to sing a song on stage, people wouldn't laugh at them or boo them openly. They would be entertained by it, and if they didn't like it they would just talk in hushed tones. I'm not exactly sure what was said behind my back, but it is better there than heard by me. And I think the same goes for all of us.

Kids see through adults' games and BS.
I grew up around my step father, who liked to play a lot of mind games with us. I remember realizing that he must have thought we were idiots. I saw through his lies and his tricks. Even the simple cliche tricks like telling us one thing in hopes of doing the opposite. Reverse psychology. We are conditioned to do what they say, but after many of the same actions we learn secrets hidden behind those actions.

33 Things About Me

1. I am 18, but I feel like I'm 30 sometimes
2. I am an extremely clumsy person, especially at work
3. I have had to deal with jokes about my name all of my life, the most common being "Do you have a sister named Summer?"
4. I was actually named after Winter Celchu from the Heir to the Empire Star Wars series by Timmothy Zahn
5. I have a minor case of OCD, and have since I was young. Certain things just bother me a lot
6. I reorganize my room a lot, even when It doesn't need to be
7. My best friend is my step sister Leanne who has been my sister for almost nine years and is only a month older than me. People sometimes ask if we are twins because we have some common features
8. I'm very introverted, I get anxious in crowds and freak out some times
9. I have three step sisters, and two half siblings. We have all been separated for about four years now
10. My favorite pet's name was "Dink" and my step father shot him one day when I was sick and asleep because he tried to bite my brother. A bit of an overreaction if you ask me, and just about anyone else
11. I dream about running away and having an adventure sometimes.
12. I had my first kiss in seventh grade with a boy who was a year older and a foot taller than me
13. I own about a hundred fifty books, and still don't have a book shelf. They all sit on top of each other on a shelf in my closet. I have to move them around a lot, when I buy more books.
14. I hold on to things tightly sometimes, I think that maybe thats why I have a really good memory.
15. I used to go dozens of months without seeing because my mom never took me to get me knew glasses, I developed a habit of squinting.
16. My biggest insecurity used to be my voice, but after I got my tonsils out I grew to accept it.
17. Sometimes I have brief periods of time where I'll read five books in a week, and then I go probably months without finishing a book.
18. I've never broken a bone before, but I had to wear a sling once for falling off a rock wall and hurting my arm
19. Even though I'm not on speaking terms with my mother or my brother, I miss them very much, and sometimes wonder if they miss me too.
20. I'm very introverted, and have been all throughout my childhood. I'd say it got a bit worse as I grew older.
21. I am a very creative person, and It is probably my favorite thing about myself
22. I've drawn since I was five. I even have the very first "drawing" book I ever had, It is spongebob and has stickers and scribbles all over it.
23. I sometimes look back at conversations I had when I was thirteen and make fun of the type of things I did and said. I was embarrassing.
24. I am a nerd
25. I got a concussion once, when my brother hit me in the head with a log a week before summer school started. Ended up with two black eyes.
26. I own a cat, but I like dogs more.
27. I've worn glasses since first grade
28. My thirteen year old sister, Jade, is as tall as me now. I haven't seen her for two years.
29. I'm obsessed with movies that make me feel sad and or happy
30. Sometimes I think I'm not good enough to pursue what I love
31. I have a whole box of notes that I passed when I was in seventh and eighth grade containing everything from songs to boys.
32. My mother hasn't spoken to me in two years, not even to wish me a happy eighteenth birthday.
33. I'm a very secretive person when it comes to my emotions and people. I'm pretty anxious in any social situation.

Peer Review

Sarah

This is Onix, she's just like any other 8 year old.

She goes to school, does her homework, and talks to her friends at recess.

But there's something that nobody at school knows about Onix.

Onix doesn't have a very good home life…

Her dad doesn't hardly ever comes home on time, and when he does...

he's always yelling at her, her mom, brother and sister. (maybe make this line a bit simpler. Something like “He’s always yelling at her and her family”)

Onix has also seen her (him) hit her mom and sister many times.

She always tried to stop him, but never could (be)cause he was stronger.

Onix's mom was always working and (is/was) hardly ever home as well.

So her sister would take care of her and her brother.

But then eventually, her sister moved out on her own. (her sister got older and had to leave?)

So then Onix's grandma started watching them.

Her grandma is the coolest grandma in the world.

She would play video games with her and her brother.

Watch TV with them.

Watch movies with them.

Show them how she makes their food.

Draw with them.

And take them out to the Library and park.

Onix's grandma was always there for her and her siblings when they needed her.

Whenever Onix was sad, her grandma would always make her happy again.

Her grandma made her happier than anyone else in the world.

Now Onix is 18, and her grandma is 85 years old.

She sometimes has trouble remembering things.

But even though she doesn't always remember...

Onix always will.

It is a great story, I really like how you ended it. A suggestion I have is to fix the tense of the story, It starts out present tense and then wanders a bit. I love the name Onix, its unique and creative. Not many kids that age know that kind of stuff happens, so I think the goal of the story is good and can be very enlightening.

Amber

The town of Rainbow Rivers was a busy, and bustling (not sure second graders will know what bustling means, maybe find another word?) community.

The residents of the town were all very happy, and proud of what their town had become, but today would change their lives forever.

It had started like every other. Scarlet was a very proud young girl who always wore a shade a of red. She went to Crayolas School of Art like all the other little crayon children.  Her best friend was Dandelion and they would make beautiful orange paintings together.

Forest and Violet loved having art class together cause they could make amazing  ocean tides.

Their teachers were always so impressed with the four students group work because the finished product would always be a masterpiece.

It was a nice sunny day in late August, and the bell to dismiss class buzzed. (maybe simplify this statement. “The final bell rang”?) Scarlet, Dandelion, Forest, and Violet all started to walk home together.

All of a sudden the sky went dark, and when the Sky became bright again Scarlet was missing.

Dandelion, Forest, and Violet  all panic and run all the way home. The yell as the go " Help Scarlet Has disappeared!"

Their cry alerts the whole town, and search parties begin to form to find the little lost crayon. They look far and wide but cant find the missing crayon.

Hours go by and the sky goes dark again and Scarlet appears in the same place she disappeared. She was injured, and had a hurt tip.  the town tries to get information out of her but she is to shaken up to say anything.

The next day Dandelion disappears, and then Forest, and Violet go missing. They return hours later in the same condition that Scarlet had been in.

The town of Rainbow Rivers turns upside down in fear of who will be the next crayon to go missing! Some crayons are taken more than once, and others are never taken(at all?).

One day Peach, a friend of Scarlet’s and the others,(another friend?) is taken, but she is brave, and strong, and she figures out what is really going on.

She explains to the town that they are all crayons and that their  beloved town of Rainbow Rivers was really a crayon box, and that they are all crayons. She also explained that their only job was to be used  by a child to color a picture.

They realized then that being a crayon was actually their responsibility and that being a crayon was a honor because they got to make a child happy.

They didn't even mind that when they got home from a day of coloring with a child that their pointy heads weren't as pointy as before.

Warning if you don't color with your crayons nicely they might become mad, and protest.

I plan to use computer pictures mixed together, and I plan to do it by myself.

My only suggestion is to simplify it a bit, keep in mind that you are writing for second graders. I like the story, especially the line “They didn't even mind that when they got home from a day of coloring with a child that their pointy heads weren't as pointy as before.”

Children's Story First Draft

Marvin the monster didn't want to sleep
He went and left his room, making a peep
"All of my siblings are still awake, I want to be like them and stay up late"
Marvin the monster knew that his friends' days had ends, but he didn't at all want to be like them
Marvin the monster laid in his bed, thinking of things to do to avoid his dread
"I'm thirsty" he said, so he went to get a glass of water
"Now i'm hungry" so he went to eat a sandwich
"I forgot to read my story" So he went to read a story
"I'm cold" so he went to get another blanket
Marvin the monster finally went back to bed, where he tossed and he turned and he laid his head
"If I don't sleep, then tomorrow I can't play. I'll be too tired and yawn all day"
Marvin the monster fell asleep, Marvin the monster made no peep

About The Author

Winter Mahana is a woman with an immense skill for writing. She lives in Springfield Missouri in a small apartment with her cat, Walter. In addition to writing Winter also loves to draw, which is shown in her illustrations for her various books. She has published a total of twenty-two children's books and hopes to publish many more to inspire young readers everywhere.

Books for Kids

Title: This Is Not My Hat
Author: Jon Klassen
Author's Bio: None
Cover: Very simplistic, just shows a fish in a hat swimming in a black background.
Pages: 36
Characters: The main fish, the big fish, and the crab. All of which do not have names.
Setting: The whole book takes place underwater.
Summary: This little fish steals a hat from a big fish who is sleeping. The little fish gets complacent and doesn't think that he will ever get caught. The crab is a witness and points the big fish in the way of where the perpetrator went. The big fish goes in the direction and gets his hat back.